1 day to go

& I’m feeling pretty low

Not downright sad

But melancholy is just as bad

It should be celebratory

However i don’t feel performative

Low key, just me, my babies

that’s all and that’s it

It’s been a while since I’ve felt the blues, over a year in fact. The cloud began to form a week or so ago and I thought I’d be able to shake it off…

I did well during the stay at home order last year this time. Having a birthday during quarantine and attending virtual celebrations took the pressure off. The gatherings felt more genuine but so much has changed since then.

So many are eager to return to this thing they refer to as “normal” and I realize that I was actually enjoying the NEW normal. I had a peace in the protection of being at home.